And I know it might be a little selfish for me to say
But I need to know if you thought of me at all today






Tyler Joseph 

Ghost

Maybe I'm just a ghost
Dwelling among the people who used to love me
But I'm not in their sight, I'm not in their minds
So I'm the only one I'm haunting, it seems

So I sit in the corner with my knees to my chest
They think I don't care when I'm trying my best
If this is you putting our friendship to the test
I think I've given up now, so grade me an F

If they can't see the ghost of me
It's not worth all the blood I'm bleeding
People don't care like they did once
If you can't live without your friends, don't fall in love

I'm in the middle of a room crowded with faces
Screaming at the top of my lungs
Faces that I've known for years
And nobody even looks up

Where'd you go, where'd you go?
Will I ever even know?
I wanna say I'm in checkmate--
Does that happen to ghosts?



But you know where to find me
Thing is, you're not looking

Tears roll across my face as I lie down
Again
I honestly don't know why this time
It could be a number of things
I'm tired.


I wonder if for his birthday
He just wants me to be okay
I know he's been wanting that for quite a while
Okay
I'm okay

Bouquet

A dried bouquet
Inside a box
Inside my room
A dried bouquet
Inside my head
They left too soon
A dried bouquet in the corner brings tears to my eyes
Left me sobbing on my bedroom floor last week
Because that's how things work now
Nothing says it's over like her dried bouquet in my room instead of hers
It's no one's fault.
It's these things that make me pull my knees to my chest
It's dried bouquets and aged poetry
Notes in my journal from girls who run away
Old pictures on Facebook and a brother who yells at me
Because he's dying inside and doesn't know what to say
Cluttering my desk up and perfume before bed
An old note from Joseph, late nights on my blog
Waking up from a nightmare and taking a breath
Burning tears in my eyes when I can't write a song
A pile of schoolbooks, a song on my playlist
My well-known "talents" that I don't actually have
A text from Rebekah, tear stains on my blanket
Watching him leave and then going to class
It's these things that make me a little afraid
That the sadness is too much for me to overtake
So now, on myself, I'm calling out checkmate
It's the only word I can articulate

I love you too.  -_-

You know what's funny is
How much I always worried about her
Now the footprints she left behind when she ran
Speak to me, saying

You were right, you were right, you were right

I guess he didn't want to see me enough
Maybe I said something wrong
Maybe I touched a wound, or killed a hope
Or didn't say anything at all
But when something's wrong with you,
Something's wrong with me
So I'm crying in my room
And trying not to scream
Because when I find myself at the bottom again
I see all the other things down here
Like how I should have gone to the last Anchorage
To be there for Shelby, despite the tears
I think about the past, which makes my stomach churn
And the girl whose sun I stole
I'm done.
He wants to run away
Sometimes he's fighting to keep alive
I'm afraid he'll go to Siberia
Without me this time
And, and, and
I have more
But it actually hurts to write them out
I guess it has before
I wonder how long you'll think I'm worth waiting for
I wonder how long till you slam the front door
I wonder how long I can keep up like this
But I know that you'll always be someone I miss
I'm sorry if I hurt you today
I don't know what I said
But when all I can do is lie in bed
It's awful hard to forget
I think I'm fading tonight
I think I'm fading tonight
I think that maybe I'm fading tonight